I offishully have an appytite

For brekfist this morning I ate two jars of baby food and part of a plate of Fansy Feest. Later I ate 4 more jars of baby food. Baby food is vary good. So I think I'm gonna start insisting on it. Spicy Vixin Sadie posted a git well foto on her blog wich had me standing at attenshun if yoo know whut I meen. And forchewnitly that Daisy cat hazn't bin bak to sing any of her syruping sweet git well songs --- kyoot kid, but she is NOT a singer (sorry, Skeez, but it's da trooth). I'm still spending a lot of time in the shower. Skeez' came and vizited me thare wich was hard for him becuz he hates water so much. But I like it. It's nice and cool and pryvit. Not unlike my gutter, wich they still won't let me go owtside to.

Feelin' Groovy

I am feeling better today. I got tired of being forse feeded, so I ate brekfist on my own. I'm still letharjik, but that's not much diffrint frum how I am all the time, anyway. The lady is konvinst I started to tern arownd once she put the majik water frum spicy vixin Halloween on me. The trooth is, I just don't wunt that Daisy singin' me any more of her happy songs.

SCORE!!!!

No, not a baseball refrinse. Me and Mao have figyerd owt how to go thru the stuff the guy in the bloo shorts leeves evry day, and find the stuff adrest to the wite rat and konfiskate it. Like today. Gold mine. The wite rat's frends Boogers, Fido and Honda sent him a pawsome catnip pillow that was fild with primo stuff. Me and Mao inspekted that littul item until, qwite frankly, it was history. (If yooda smelt it, yoo wood have dun ixzaktly the same thing... it was sweet!) And thare was a Eester card frum that gerl Daisy for him. We're still trying to figyer owt whut to do with that! Maybe rite sumthing like, "Deer Skeezix, yer vary nice, but I want to be that big ManCat Rocky's spicy vixin." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This is vary fun.

Skeezie's bin serfing porn ... or has he?

Skeezy has bin beehaving vary oddly the last few daze. Then yesterday, win the peepul were at cherch, I notist that he'd be on the compyooter with his big noze rite up aginst the skreen, and then he wood run and git a drink of water and then go bak to the compyooter skreen. And he did this over and over agin for most of the morning. Well, since I'm the oldest and am kinda reesponsibul for him win the peepul are not in the howse, I wint to investigate. And I FOWND PORN ON THE SKREEN HE'D BIN LOOKING AT! So, I got closer and looked reel hard to make shur it was porn, and I snift to see if I cood smell any good smells, and then I lookt for the parentul kontrol button so that the peepul woodn't see that on the skreen win they got home and blame it on me. And then suddinly I realized that the porn ho on the skreen wasn't a porn ho at all --- it was Skeezy's speshul frend Daisy. (I didn't rekugnize her withowt her hot pokka dot spagetti strap dress.) So I left reel qwik becuz akording to Man Roolz, yoo can't be kot looking at anuther cat's porn ho, espeshully win he's her speshul frend. Sorry, Skeez, my bad. THE END --- RtGC